Getting your Trinity Audio player ready...
|
That little voice. You know the one. That little voice that fears someone made a big mistake by letting you into the club. That little voice that says you’re not supposed to be here. That little voice that fears everyone else knows something you don’t. Thus, from stage left, enters imposter syndrome.
I distinctly remember sitting in my law school classroom as a 1L, looking around, and wondering when someone was going to come through that door, call my name, and escort me out. Despite having graduated from a good university’s honors college, despite having earned a position with a selective Teach For America program prior to law school, despite knowing in my heart of hearts that I had done the work to be there, that little voice remained. It remains by my side today, like a modern-day imaginary friend for adults.
That imaginary friend’s voice got louder in times of challenge. It was certainly louder when I failed the bar, when the firm pulled their offer, when I was learning the ropes, receiving redlines dripping with revisions, and more. Today, I’ve learned how to channel those sentiments and that negative self-talk in a much more positive manner, thanks in large part to a fantastic mentor. For the longest time, I felt like a duck: appearing calm, cool, and collected above the water while simultaneously paddling ferociously underneath.
At one point, when I built up enough trust, I shared those feelings and that little voice with a mentor of mine. They shared that they have that same little voice, and it’s still with them over twenty years into practice. Moreover, they shared a salient piece of guidance with me that day, one that I’ll carry with me forever: they told me that little voice is a superpower, a type of self-awareness that you can either use to your advantage—or let it limit you.
From that day forward, that little voice became a friend. These days, I feel that little voice the loudest in those moments of discomfort. That’s how I know that I’m doing something right. I know that I need to dig deeper and work harder. As a former educator, I know that growth requires the courage to take risks.
We never learn or grow by staying where we are comfortable. This is why I love the saying, “Get comfortable being uncomfortable.” Now, that is not to say go out and commit malpractice, but it is to say you should embrace the opportunity to take big swings because that’s how we learn and grow. And you must do so with the appropriate support that enables you to be courageous.
All that said, it’s important to note that the prerequisite in this risk-taking scenario is the safety to feel courageous. That safety comes from finding those friends, mentors, managers, partners, and supervising attorneys that build you up. These are the people that you can call in moments of self-doubt, confusion, or frustration. We all need those people. These are those same people who will be there both to celebrate your successes and help you navigate the throes of your career.
If you feel like you don’t have someone who can provide that sort of support, know that there are thousands of people you’ve never met that are already your biggest fans, who want to help you to achieve your most ambitious goals, and they are just waiting for you to reach out. Don’t be shy and remember to pay it forward for the next cohort of future legal leaders coming behind you.
You got this. Be like Bobby Boucher in The Waterboy and use that little voice as tackling fuel.
About the author:
Tyler Quillin serves as principal corporate counsel at Microsoft Corporation.